I have opened a new post window half a dozen times in the last month only to close it again without typing a word. I’ve been battling fairly severe depression for some time (read: months and months), and although I’m generally functional and even smiling at times, I have had little mental energy for putting down words. I’m sure this will change – in fact, this post is a good sign – but I’ve frankly been surviving and not thriving, as it were.
A couple of career things of note have happened recently. I’ve sold more art (I seem to be on a slow, but upward trend), and I am a semi-finalist again for the RWA Open Exhibition. The painting they’ve asked me to ship to them is this one: The Weight of It. It’s one I’m very confident about and was created this year during this depression that just won’t shift. It would be an incredible opportunity to have the work hung. Fingers crossed.
Selling some work has given me much needed business money to buy supplies. My occupation is an expensive one, even when I obsessively dig through the depths of the internet for bargains, sales, and auctions. I’m back to being uncomfortably poor in the bank account, but I am sporting new pencils, display easels, canvases, oil paints, a pencil sharpener, and have upgraded to Sennelier oil pastels. I have what I need to do my job, and I do it to the best of my ability every day. I need wider exposure to sell more art and that is something I’m working on when I have the mental energy to do so. I added a tag to my portfolio site called “affordable” where I hope to sell works below £150 to new or existing customers interested in building their art collections. That category will grow as I get more work up on the site (a never-ending task as I produce prolifically and have boxes and shelves of works yet “unreleased”).
My writing dry spell will likely continue for awhile, but I thought I’d get a few words out there for those who might wonder why I’d disappeared. I am OK, in the loosest sense of the word. I like being alone a lot; I feel fairly disconnected in general. I have a project I’m working on for someone and it’s frustrating me. I probably should’ve said no to it, but saying no is an area in need of improvement for me. The thing that keeps me sane is my painting. In fact, I’m going to go do some of that now.