Free stuff and I don’t really care why you need it

First let me say: I love Freecycle. I’ve offloaded several things that we no longer needed, plus I always find the digest emails entertaining.

Earlier this evening I gave away a perfectly good – less than one year old – vacuum cleaner. I also briefly stated my reason for getting rid of it, just so people would know that it wasn’t defective in some way. (If you’re dying to know yourself, we upgraded to a machine that also washes carpets. It’s absolutely THE shit and has raised the bar against which I will measure all future vacuuming machines.)

Begin the crazy.

So, Freecycle is kind of a first-come idea. I get an email and respond with something like, “You’re first. Let’s pick a time for you to come get the item.” Seems simple enough, no?
I think some (or most) respondents must believe the best story wins the item.
No, no, no- I do not need to know about your current vacuum cleaner. I do not need to know that you need a vacuum cleaner (that would seem evident by the answering of the ad). I do not need to know how abnormally hairy your house is due to [fill in blank here]. I don’t need to know how many kids you have. Or that you just moved to the area. And really, I don’t need to know that “the council has ordered [anonymous family member here] to put in carpet.” Far too much information, people.

Anyway, point is, I don’t care why you need a vacuum cleaner. I’m guessing you need to suck up some dirt and that’s honestly enough for me, entertaining as the emails have been.
Freecycle mentality is a strange thing.

So now I’m thinking about putting an old electric Shiatsu massage machine up for grabs just for the entertainment value of the emails. I’m already imagining the stories I’ll hear to claim it: ‘I fell off a horse ten years ago and ever since I get the occasional neck pain.’ ‘My aunt lives with us and we are tired of rubbing her neck for her…’ ‘I was curious what other uses it might have- can I use it on my feet? How about my dog?’
Oh! the possibilities! 😀

If you want to read some funny, hand-picked Freecycle ads without signing up to your local Yahoo Group, check out FreecycleGems. There’s some real entertainment value there.

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