OK- this is another reason I’m so fond of this guy…
Read this on preggies and babies in the workplace.
I always felt uncomfortable and irritated at the assumption that since I’m female, I must want to:
A) hear all about the names you’ve picked, the decor for the baby’s room, the things you’ve bought in preparation
B) listen about how you ache, cry too much, eat too much, crave strange things, need to: leave early/not come/in-take long lunches because you have appointment xyz, felt it kick, it’s moving so much, it’s really uncomfortable today/yesterday/last week
C) suffer through how you’ve been trying to get pregnant/got pregnant so fast/it isn’t as bad as the last time/they tell you how easy you’re having it
D) endure the tours you give with your new semi-mobile, gurgling meat-lump- thrusting it in every half-willing persons arms, chuckling when it gets pukey, babbling about the sleepless nights and your sore udder-like tits, marvelling like you’ve created the perfect little being
E) put up with questions like: “isn’t he amazing?” “when are you planning on kids?” “want to babysit?” “why don’t you have kids yet?”
I’ll tell you why I don’t have kids. I don’t want them. Not even one. Never have. I’m not interested in having a baby. I think too many people get pressured by society and hype into procreation. How many nagging “grandmas-to-be” even delicately badger daughters into giving their independence up for motherhood? How many welfare mothers have more kids to collect more government money? How many husbands demand a bloodline/last name continuance in flesh? How many poor, disadvantaged, ill, ineffectual, lazy and/or truly incapable (socially being just one area of ineptitude), people procreate recreationally, flippantly, or out of ignorance?
I want no part of the race. I don’t want to give up my life and independence. I find it actually more selfish to give in to societal programming and proposed normalcy than to really face and choose what may be better off for you, your surrounding friends and environment, and likely best for the life you decide not to create. Being childless isn’t anything to be ashamed of or sorry for. Revel in the choice to remain childless. Enjoy your life. It’s yours. If you choose to become a mother… fine. Be the best mother possible. That involves being very attentive, loving, and nurturing. There is no room in a child’s development for your laziness, excuses, poor eating/smoking/drinking/drug habits. There is no excuse for failure. Be a fantastic parent or just don’t be a parent. Period. Do what’s best for you and the potential child. Creating life isn’t a fucking joke and don’t take it for granted.
I am unable to have children. I felt this way long before the option was taken away in a surgeon’s bucket of biological hazards. I had a radical hysterectomy to free me from cancer of the cervix. I have always considered myself fortunate to have lost my reproductive parts and retain my mind and my ability to use it to contribute positively to the planet in all the small ways I can.
And, best of all…
I don’t have to share my action figures or change diapers. That rocks.