We had a removals company around yesterday to pack away more than half of our belongings into storage. This makes the move itself easier and gives us the floorspace to finish the packing here and begin the final clean and polish of the flat before we hand over the keys. We’ll be living with minimal furniture and out of a few boxes for several weeks, but it will be worth it in the end. After stepping around boxes, bruising shins and thighs, and watching dirt and mess build up for the past month, it is a pleasure to walk unobstructed through this home. Today, I’ll be able to properly vacuum for the first time in a month. I am thrilled!
I am exhausted this morning. This has been a tough couple of months. I’m coping with minimal St John’s Wort (only minimal due to my forgetfulness) but I hope to never test myself (or the St John’s) with such a trinity of big events again: starting a new business, moving house, husband having surgery. The business is going along alright, but could use more of my attention. The moving is going alright, but could be better organised. The husband is healing (after a worrying, unplanned overnight in the hospital), and he’s obviously most important, though it’s unfortunate that his surgery was scheduled to overlap with this already busy time for us. It’s just one of those things, you know, everything at once, when it rains it pours, yadda yadda. I’m not sleeping right, but Neil is better, we’re on schedule for the move, and my business is making sales. Soon, two of those items will fall away as completed and the business will be my main focus again. I’m looking forward to it. I can’t help but to feel that I’m coasting too much and not driving hard enough at everything. It makes me uncomfortable to ‘get by’ with a task. I’m managing the focus allocations, but the price is that I’m also doing no art, no writing, no anything else that makes me feel like more than a machine. It’ll pass. This is more a blog post of observation. Something I needed to get out and analyse for myself. I know we’re in the home-stretch on several things, and that life and its to-do list are always crowded, but I think I can’t be in the new house soon enough.
Perhaps it’s the need for change. The next rung, and my fingertips are just shy of reaching it today, but tomorrow they’ll be closer. There is always the temptation to wish for a Fast-Forward button during certain points in life, but I don’t think I’d ever use it, even if I could. Not being able to shoot to the tops of ladders is a good thing, even if it means feeling a little thinly spread and only adequate for now. I’ll do what I can in this space between rungs for now.
So, I vacuum. Then I take over the world.
Gonna probably need more coffee for that second one though… Could be a tall ladder.