Mar

30

Moleskine artists and getting over the fear of a blank page

Filed Under creative stuff, tout le fromage | 4 Comments

Having a Moleskine seems to be all the rage right now, and with the number of Moleskine artists posting their projects on flickr increasing, it’s no wonder there’s buzz. The quiet little notebook with a big history seems to be just sitting by and enjoying the word-of-mouth marketing gospel spread by a growing number of web savvy devotees.

the tools for Moleskine artists

I too am a Moleskine lover and fortunately, Neil shares my notebook obsession. Our household contains nearly every configuration of the product. The paper is fine, the sizes are good, and the smell — yes, I said smell — of a new Moleskine is intoxicating. (I’m one of those kids who always sniffed new textbooks in school and I can say, without a doubt, that new Moleskine is better than any tome on European Literature I’ve ever had the pleasure of huffing.)

Since I’m relatively new to the Moleskine cult (less than a year of proper use out of me) I am still working through the little anxieties of dirtying the unbelievably sexy pages of my notebooks with my scratches and scribbles. I only want to draw masterpieces in them; I only want to write finished poetry or prose in them. These, after all, will be what I leave behind as my legacy right? Well, I’m getting over that mindset. I’m starting to take notes in them. I’m starting to Mind Map in them. I’m ignoring lines in the lined ones and writing words and drawings in the squared ones. I’m even decorating the covers of the Cahiers! I am running with scissors now and getting over the guilt of mistreating my Moleskines with my scrawling and rule-breaking.

As it turns out, there are loads of Moleskine devotees out there dirtying pages — sometimes several times per day — and posting their inspirational results out on flickr. I used to look at these as creatively intimidating images of Moleskine fearlessness and believe that I could never achieve the same confidence. But, I’m sure in my heart that most of these artists had to get over the same fear of the empty notebook that I did. Neil is certainly over it and although he told me this morning that he still gets the odd “what if I run out of ideas before I finish the Moleskine” thought, I trust he will have several volumes of Moleskine sketch books filled with brilliance before I finish even one. Of course, we are different Moleskine users and that is part of the magic of a blank notebook, be it a Pukka Pad, Black and Red, or handmade diary of exotic paper— choose a notebook that appeals to you and fill the damn thing. Fill it with whatever you need to, want to, or can. Take your time or let it come crashing out of your mind at top speed. It doesn’t do what it’s best at by sitting there empty. Fill it. Then get another notebook… Rinse and repeat, as they say.

Have a look at flickr for some Moleskine artists. Don’t let yourself be intimidated by the work of others in expensive little notebooks— be inspired. Then find some paper… any paper will do, though not all will smell the same…

Moleskinerie group pool on flickr
Moleskine: One Page at a Time group on flickr

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Mar

29

Short and Fuzzy - The last of the Madeira diaries

Filed Under me so g33ky, tout le fromage | 4 Comments

Short and Fuzzy podcastShort and Fuzzy episode 7 is out now and this episode is our Day 6 holiday recap recorded on a noisy little mini-disc as we chronicled our holiday experiences in Madeira.
This is the final of seven Madeira podcasts. I was busy this week and completely forgot to announce this episode release sooner! The next Short and Fuzzy will be recorded soon… and will be numbered in a way that makes sense. ;)
Short and Fuzzy is a podcast and I’m fifty percent of it. It’s a half hour show of Neil and I gabbing on about whatever is in our heads. It’s unscripted and, for the most part, unedited.
You’ve been warned and now you’re getting the link
(pick one that appeals to your geekness):

There’s also Winamp, Real, and RSS feeds on the BTPS page.

Episode Notes: The Final Day: The Saunacast! There is little better than a relaxing final day before the journey home. Great snoozing, German tourist habits, the sauna - sweat is different to wet, you know - discovering Poncha and the rather healthy stray cats and dogs all around. This is our final holidaycast for this year, recorded during our November 2006 visit to Madeira.
Good times!

Our next Short and Fuzzy will likely happen after the move. I’d love for it to be sooner, but there are other priorities ahead of recording a new show right now. The next one will be fresh and current— I can at least tell you that much!
Thank you for listening!

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Mar

25

Going through old photo files

Filed Under photos, tout le fromage | Leave a Comment

reDCP_3958.jpg

I decided to post-process a few older shots this evening. You’ll find them on my flickr photo page.
More to come.

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Mar

23

flickr has made some service changes

Filed Under me so g33ky, photos, tout le fromage | Leave a Comment

Just a note to flickr account holders (this means you too, Mom): You’ll likely want to go into your account settings and change your search options. Apparently flickr is doing a little something regarding moderation of search results and age appropriate content, so if you want uncensored search results then you’ll need to change the new default setting. This setting does not only mean that you could potentially filter out (or include) potentially offensive photos, but also art, illustrations, and screenshots as well.

You’ll want to go to You > Your Account > Privacy & Permissions > SafeSearch settings

From that point, you’re on your own. I have set my account to SafeSearch off and I am including all types of content. You may not want computer screenshots included, but I do.

A bunch of the categorisation appears to be voluntary, meaning that the uploader is largely responsible for classifying his content or retro-classifying what is already up there. I’m sure there will be huge discrepancies as some users have thousands of photos uploaded and who has time to filter through and reclassify…

Regardless, if you want art, illustrations, adult content (which I assume includes any form of artistic nudity or disturbing imagery), or computer generated or captured images included in your flickr search results, you need to make some changes to your settings.

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Mar

22

Smiley monkey says everything will be OK

Filed Under photos, tout le fromage | 4 Comments

reDSC00367.jpg

I find it impossible to hold back a smile when I see this silly monkey. He’s a plastic bank, maybe fourteen or sixteen inches tall, and a part of Aaron’s childhood stuff.

I love this monkey. (He was a good model too…)

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Mar

21

no more about this today

Filed Under regular, tout le fromage | 5 Comments

OK- making this brief because I’d rather start blogging about something other than my mental health.

The Unit Administrator and the patient liaison can not do anything more. I wrote to the Primary Care Trust and have not heard back yet. So I decided to tackle my local GP… I am often, even in the worst of times, tenacious.

I printed every email, gathered all my records, and walked to the practice without an appointment. I explained the situation to the receptionist and she managed to get me an urgent same-day appointment with the head doctor. (I would not see the GP who was involved with the referral.) I’ve been to that appointment, have finally seen the refusal letter from Maudsley and have the attention of the head doctor. He’s writing letters this evening and getting my situation under control. He doesn’t understand the referral refusal either and the wording is vague at best. He’s getting to the bottom of it. I believe him. I left his office feeling very positive and hopeful. If I get local psychiatric care first, fine. Give it to me. If they then decide I need Maudsley, cool. Send me. I just need the ball rolling and finally, after some of the deepest lows I’ve ever been through, I’m seeing promise.

I also re-read my evaluation records from the US… turns out they pegged me for bi-polar too. Neato. I knew my depression intertwined with my ADHD and that Adderall XR (the meds I was on for ADHD) can positively affect comorbidities such as depression. No wonder I felt better all around… and bi-polar runs in my family. I am not surprised at finding that in my evaluation notes.

So, progress made.

And now, I need a sandwich. :)

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Mar

21

mini update

Filed Under regular, tout le fromage | Leave a Comment

The NHS admitted to a clerical error when dating my referral and refusal. They’ve bumped it forward to 6 October for the referral and 17 October for the rejection. This presents a new problem with the timeline…

My GP requested my US medical records to include in the referral. I have them in front of me and the postage date and the stamp on the Customs Declaration both say 20 October. I gave my GP copies of these the day I received them, which would be at the very least, a few days after that postage and Customs stamp.

He didn’t wait.

I feel cheated and sabotaged.

I have made the case known to the Primary Care Trust and am still pressing for help from the Unit Administrator and the patient liaison. I am so tired of this. I am so tired.

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Mar

21

Getting down to the truth of it

Filed Under regular, tout le fromage | 2 Comments

This morning I did some more digging around here on my blog for ammunition to fight the NHS with. Boy did I find a good one. I wrote the Unit Administrator and the patient liaison with the information. It’s not my best letter writing, but I barely got any sleep last night. It’ll do. Here’s what they got:
—
Good morning <names omitted here>-

As you can imagine, yesterday was a difficult day. Today, I want to get to the bottom of the conflicting dates regarding my referral from Dr <name omitted> to Maudsley.

In summary, and as I keep an electronic journal, I have a timeline to go by. You’ll see the very first contact I was considering is AFTER the date I was supposedly already rejected.

28 September 2006:
Quoted from my online journal:

I’m Trying
By jEN | September 28, 2006

I’m trying to get up the courage to call the doctor.
I wish I didn’t feel this sort of semi-embarrassment that I feel about going to the GP regarding my brain.
I don’t want to tell him about it. I don’t want to give him the names and numbers of the mental health clinic that I saw in the US so he can obtain my records. I don’t want to admit to a person all of my mental health flaws and then get told to make an appointment with another doctor only to have to spill them all over again to another stranger. NHS protocol tells me that I go to a GP first, then, if the GP can’t fix what ails you, they send you to someone else. I understand this to be a fair and reasonable practise, but when it comes to mental health I just find it an embarrassing obstacle. I don’t like to admit to myself that my brain is flawed, let alone want to tell a gaggle of different doctors who don’t even know me about it. I’d rather parade naked in front of them all than divulge that I have something wrong inside my head and need help for it. I went through all this in the US. That was hard enough.
I wouldn’t get rid of my ADD, but I don’t like the impersonal nature of this process.
I think I’m stalling. I should pick up the phone.
I’m going to look the protocol for mental health issues and the NHS up online first. Maybe there is another way…

I have further entries that document my depression and difficulties with obtaining a referral from a doctor whose first awareness of Adult ADD/ADHD came from my request for his help.

The timeline needs looked into further and I need to know the next step. I have waited so long and understand that sometimes mistakes happen, but there is no way I could have been refused before I’d ever made my GP aware and sought a referral.

Please help.

Thank you.
Sincerely,
Jennifer Dixon
—

Needless to say, I feel a helluva lot better with this documentation on my side. They are wrong. I have proof. In fact, even if someone ignored my blog post, then the records of being seen by my GP would refute the claim that I was denied a referral on the 27th of September.

No tears today. I’m all about getting this sorted.

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